Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Adultcon and Bizarre

I'm going to be at Adultcon with Kimberly Kane this weekend! So if you're in LA you'd better come say "hi" to us.

And I'm up on Bizarre Magazine's website!

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Mandy Candy Candids!

Here are some behind the scenes photos from today's shoot with Kimberly Kane. (Click the pics to view full size.)

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

I am awake and online way too early today.

Um. If you want to see "crappy" webcam pics of me and my tits you should follow me on Twitter. Examples below.

And I found these pics of me from Riot Girls (shot back in March) this morning. The makeup is a bit weird. If you want to see 'em bigger you can click on 'em. Like, my butt will be bigger.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Mandy Morbid Vs. Death Frost Doom

(So I played the D&D module "Death Frost Doom" yesterday, here's a report from my friend who ran it.)

If any of you are following or involved in the Old School Dungeons & Dragons revival, then you've probably heard of Death Frost Doom, the new adventure written by Old School D&D Blog Overlord James Edward Raggi IV.

It has gotten rave reviews around the Old School D&D blogworld for its creepy and fatalistic atmosphere, as well as its horror-movie-like cruelty. Most people run through it die or go insane or both. Plus you can download it for 5 bucks off the web.

Anyway, Mandy was bored today and her eye was infected so she couldn't play video games, so we downloaded Death Doom Frost and ran it as a solo adventure.

Here's how it went:



So in addition to her old stand-by, Tizani Ildiko, 3rd Level Cleric of Vorn, Mandy rolled up a Dwarf Fighter (Gowron) and an Elf Sorceress (Ilona)--both first level.

(Gamers may want to know at this point what system we used--we used a mongrel of 1st edition AD&D (because that's what we'd been playing with our friends up until now and because we like it) and edition 3.5 (because that's all Mandy has the books for at the moment because someone gave them to her)(However, edition ended up not mattering at all much because see below).

So I tell Mandy that the Sister Superior of Vorn has told her to fetch a certain book that is rumored to be on a mountiantop, in a place of great evil. Then I put on "Ceremony of Opposites" by Samael. ( I would've put on colder, doomier things like Wolves In The Throne Room and Amebix's "Winter" but I played them to death during our last session which was heavy on wolf demons, witches, hunters and other wintry paganisms.)

Mandy laughs because "There is a place of great evil in the wilderness" is exactly what a priestess says at the beginning of Diablo and you hear it a million times if you play Diablo.

So anyway, these three trudge up the frozen mountain and encounter the weird old backwoods disturbing hick who warns you not to go up to the cabin on top of the mountain.

Now, there is a thing that will happen if you fuck with this guy, and a thing that will happen if you try to walk past him when he warns you not to head up the mountain.

But Mandy did not do these things. She pretended to be going around the mountain, walked off into the woods, then continued the path up to the cabin, so neither of these things happened.

Mandy heard The Disturbing Sounds and did not follow them to their source.

Then Mandy saw The Nightmarish Tree. She gave The Nightmarish Tree a wide berth.

Nor did she investigate The Stone Well. Likewise she saw The Frozen Corpse and fucked not with it. Nor did she do any of the things you're not supposed to do in The Graveyard.

Not having much else to do, she went into The Cabin.

She looked at The Clock, The Bizarre Painting, The Harpsichord, The Chairs That Are Facing You When You Come Through The Door and The Deer Head and none of these did she fuck with.

She took the Purple Powder and because she had a Dwarf and a Sorceress with her, knew that it could Drive You Mad Or Turn You Into A God and put it in her pack. She saw the Dead Guy's Stuff and took it.

She used a spell to decrypt the writing on the walls, then took this note--"Runic writing says bad things".

Then she went down into the Trap Door.

She fucked not with the Screaming Faces On The Wall, went through the Demon Head Carved Door and into the Room With The Skeleton Hands. She did not fuck with the hands.

I told her "You see a sigil on the door, it looks like This" (and showed her a picture).

I said "It fills you with unease and nausea" she said "I knew you'd say that."

The CD ended and I put on Cradle of Filth, which was perfect for a second because at the beginning of the album there's creepy choral music and just as the voices began to spiral up, she entered...

The Demonic Chapel--
wherein Mandy fucked not with the Pews, nor the Organ of Bone, nor the Skulls on Hooks, nor the basins with teeth (except reaching into one to pull out the treasure and taking some unholy water), nor the Jewelled Dagger and Necklace, ("I'm not a thief, so I left them--I figured the altar was carved like a skull mouth so it might clamp shut or something"), nor the Demonic Murals, Nor The Door That Leads East.

I got sick of Cradle of Filth and put on Sleep.

Mandy then investigated The Crypts of the Priests, Warriors, and Commoners respectively and got all the gold out of the crypts. She did not go down the spiral staircases.

She investigated The Embalming Room and took the Book that was there, but did not read it.

She went into the room with the eyepiece and the books on pedestals, she took the eyepiece and put it in a sack.

She went into The Bloodstained Prayer Room and did not translate any of the writing.

She went right past the Room With The Black Fountains.

Then she got to The Plant Monster.

Now, you'll notice absolutely nothing has happened so far. If you know the module, you'll also know that killing the plant monster--for complex reasons--causes the dead to rise from their graves. And there's no way the players can know this.

So here, as the referee, I am getting excited, finally, somethings going to happen: Mandy can't get the book she's been sent here to get without getting past this plant.
She can see it there on the other side of this plant.

Also over there is a Gold Altar, an Inscription, A Pit, And Two Gold Cups.

So, she starts killing this plant. Acid, axe, axe, axe. Now it's dead. It almost kills her dwarf but she heals the dwarf. So she's past the plant.

Unbeknownst to her, the dead begin to rise from their graves.

I tell Mandy "There's a book--it matches the description of the book you've been sent to get, along with two cups, and..."

"We grab the book and the cups and run back the way we came."

"So you're just..."


So then the players run, full speed, out of the dungeon, they run into some of the living dead, who scrape up the sorceress and kill the dwarf, but the party just keeps running, past the skeletons underground, past the ghouls above ground, and down the mountain.

And that's that and the adventure is over and now an army of undead walks the earth. "That's not my problem," says Mandy.

"Mandy," I say "everybody who runs this module has everybody die or goes insane or at least they find it really creepy, but you just ran in, got the stuff and left, scott free. How the hell did you do that?"

(Mandy is not a terribly experienced RPGer, this is her seventh night out.)

"I've played video games, I've played Zelda and Diablo--I know when you go around in a crypt the dead are going to come back. I know you just run in and get the stuff and leave. I mean, they sent me to get the book, I got it. It sucks that the dwarf had the purple powder--but I can go back for that later."

"So, um, did you like the adventure?"

"It was fun, I mean, it wasn't as creepy as (the last adventure we played), but y'know, it was good despite being a bit predictable."

That's Mandy's review.

My personal dungeon master review--

It says right in the introduction:

"Careful and methodical adventurers will be able to find a great deal of treasure with absolutely no personal risk, but a number of adventurers may feel that this is not an
exciting adventuring location...if they are clever enough to never meet any opposition, they will likely be unsatisfied with the adventure as a whole without realizing how lucky they were."

Now, Mandy got the best of both worlds--it was easy and she got a lot of treasure, plus she did think it was fun. I, on the other hand, had a good enough time but just kept thinking what it would've been like if the group had included some of my other, less clearheaded, players.

I may have fucked this module up by running it right after an adventure that was already culty and creepy and full of demon terror (and using up all my best doom metal in the background). When I read Death Frost Doom, I thought the whole nothing-happens-in-the-whole-first-half-of-the-adventure-but-it's-all-creepy-and-that-builds-tension-thing was excellent, and a nice play on player expectations, but Mandy seemed to take it all in stride. Maybe it's just really hard to make a one-on-one adventure scary. Maybe you can't get the proper claustrophobia when you don't have several personalities all bickering about which door to take. Maybe none of that matters because Mandy had fun anyway. Maybe I'm just being the crazy dungeon master who imagines all the lunacy that could have been rather than the cut-and-dry cut-and-run scenario that Mandy pulled off. Maybe the most promising thing is that Mandy wants to go back later to get that purple powder.

(Anyway if any of you D&D people want to send me more modules to play I'll review 'em and post it here.)

(Also here is a link to the guy who created "Death Frost Doom"'s site

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Busy, busy!

Just a quick update so you don't all think I've abandoned you.

Last you heard I was traveling with Zak Sabbath all around on his book tour.

We haven't been in LA much.

Presently we are house and dog sitting for a friend in SoHo, New York.

I also took a 12 hour bus ride up to Canada to visit my family. Transferring in Montreal was heart wrenching, I want to live there again so much. Montreal looks like nowhere else I've ever been and I love it. The crumbling overpasses and decrepit looking factories that surround the city, the maples trees and cathedrals, the rusty bridges, the strange buildings and structures that were built for the world fair and the Olympics, it is a beautiful place. The bus drives right by the neighbourhood I grew up in. Not far from LaRonde. I watched the firework competitions from my bedroom window every summer.

I will go home someday.

Anyway, my lil sister came back to New York with me, stayed for a few days. I had to show her around because she'd never been here before, we had to go shopping a lot, of course and we explored places I never bothered to get to when I lived here. (I didn't have any friends that first year so I didn't go out much.)

It's been very, very, busy. We went to the Central Park zoo, we went to Times Square twice, we went to the Met (I adore the Met and so did she, being a second year anthropology and sociology double major, naturally), we wandered all around the east village (that is maybe the only area of NYC I know well, aside from Bushwick), found a rare $80 copy of the original Ogre Battle for the SNES for our lil brother, ate lots of pizza, we participated in the Paping Soap Box Derby that Zak and his friends put on every summer, played lots and lots and lots of Dungeons and Dragons (more about that later), went to Coney Island (where the sis agreed, out of character, to go on the Cyclone with me and then was terrified and tried to hide on me and banged her nose pretty badly as a result of not bracing herself like I told her to), we went to the Aquarium too, picked up some cotton candy to send home to my dad who has a nasty sweet tooth and loves places like Coney Island but doesn't get to travel much himself, and I took her to the Double Down Saloon on her last night. Oh, and we went to Chelsea to pick up some copies of Zak's book from his gallery and see some art. Most of the galleries were installing so she didn't get to see much, but she got the idea.

Ok. D&D: I play a tiefling priestess (Cleric). We play mostly first edition but some people, like me, had characters created for playing different editions (which is why I'm allowed to be half-demon.) I found a magic mace to replace the original mace I bought, but I haven't quite figured out yet exactly how it works. I worship Vorn the God of Iron and Rain. I'm 3rd level (possibly 4th now since we just defeated a necromancer and some demons and found our way out of the dungeon we were stuck in and regained our memories.)

Zak created and ran the module and there were usually about 9 of us playing. It was all very Jack Vance and M. John Harrison and Road of Knives.

My sister plays a half-elf illusionist. In our party we had a dwarf fighter, an elf fighter, an elf ranger-who occasionally would turn into a halfling minotaur due to a spell, a half-orc thief, a half-orc fighter, a half-elf cleric, a half-elf thief, and a human paladin also a worshiper of Vorn.

We have so far defeated an invasion of the Locust Cult, a Medusa, a Vampire Halfling Queen and her minions, some giant toads, a gargoyle, almost got killed by some peacocks, a baby black dragon, a minotaur, and some other stuff. We rescued a goblin alchemist too and a sphinx.

I found some cool books and some mystery potions.

So that's D&D so far. I'm hooked. Like really really.

I'm thinking it would be nice to live on the east coast again, nearer to my family and our friends here. I do miss LA though, but am glad to be away while the fires are happening. I wouldn't be able to leave my apartment at all if I were in Hollywood with all that smoke.

Next, we go to Seattle. Zak is reading from his new book at Bumbershoot.

I did shoot some new content for with Coco Velvett. It's being edited now. Should have something new for you all up soon!